Monday, September 29, 2008

And I'm feelin' gooooood.

Imagine you can hear Nina Simone singing and the horns playing "Feeling Good," cause that's what's playing in my head right now. Or check it out here. Aside from yesterday's post- Avonex- injection sluggishness, I've been feeling Good the last couple of weeks. We've been getting our asses handed to us in the ER and my schedule is as whacked as ever, but I've made it through each day without feeling like I'm dragging a semi behind me every step of the way. I even had the energy and drive to spend some "special time" with DH which is always good for my mood. (Wink wink, nudge nudge.) I think this is the first time since my diagnosis that I've felt it remarkable that I feel good. It's not like pre-MS good, but it's better than usual post diagnosis and thus remarkable.

The down side is that I haven't the funds to make proper use of this golden time. I'm digging the fact that I can feel and move all my limbs enough to tackle some projects around the house or catch up on important family matters like visiting the mouth torturist (dentist), but NOW I haven't the means to do anything! It's bringing me down from cloud 9 a bit that we're broke and being broke is expensive. Hello overdraft fees! Ironic, no? And of course this is when random unexpected bills come in via certified mail from folks (the state of Florida) who will not be denied. And I'm certain that I'll get on top of the financial crisis just in time to have my wallet raped by the holiday season. My family's b-days are mixed in that blessed time of year and my anniversary as well. Everyone may be getting mix-tapes this year, I think. (I made one for my dad for Father's day one year when I was broke and he loved it. He's the one who passed on the music junkie gene.) And because I'm a cynic even when in a good mood, I'm also sure that my health-shit will hit the fan again soon or my husband will run his hand thru a saw or somthing at work. I can't watch TV because it keeps telling me that my 401K is going in the toilet, so maybe I should just cancel the cable? That would certainly save me a little cash. Thank gawd blogging is free! (I've been digging everyone's posts... even if I haven't commented.) The internet and my book collection have been keeping me entertained even if neither pursuit is what I'd consider a productive use of my time.

Stress and extra pounds notwithstanding, at least I'm happy with my body right now. I've stumbled because I'm clumsy, not because I can't feel my feet. And everything that itches can be blamed on mosquitos instead of myelin monsters for once. All things considered, it could be worse!


Bald Ben said...

I to am feeling better after a long summer. I'm wondering if it has to do with the heat and all that, although I would imagine its still pretty hot in Florida.

I to understand the cash crunch, I work my ass off and when it seems like we are getting somewhere, we have just enough to get by. It's a tough scenario, but in my opinion just enjoy that you can be "normal" at least for a while. We can rest assure that the only thing that is constant is change. Not a new thought or all that profound, but true enough.

pUNKrOCKfairy said...


profundity is overrated; I'll take simple sympathy any day of the week.